Sitting by the pool at my job. I'm going to copy and paste this entry. But i needed to write and i was in front of my laptop, so isn't that convenient.Everything is kind of comming to an end now. I suppose this is the part where a new year and a new chapter start. I always considered a new year to be the begining of the school year. When summer ends and everything else begins. But this year it's different. I chose not to go back to school. I chose to get a job and get on the way to becoming what i'm supposed to be. And this is weird to me. But i chose it. Atleast i have alex with me. Who has been my partner through this all. And is taking the same road less traveled as myself. But for the first time, i am truly starting to unerstand the way things are supposed to be. I now know why adults are constantly rippign out your eardrums with words about teenagers and 'you don't know how easy you have it'. And of course i didn't know, until now, until i made it hard on myself earlier than nessacary. But i beleive in following your subconcious. The dreams that have you walking around naked in your school. I think that i don't care what people think. To a certain extent. I am quite a hypocrite. But for the most part, i see this as an adventure. I see the vaction with alex comming up as an adventure. I mean. Fuck. We have two maybe three weeeks to ourselves where the rules come from our mouths and the money is ours. ANd well, after that, it's back to work, to save every trivial penny until it becomes part of some greater expense. And then we leave. off to start our lives together as whatever we will be. Two adults forever teenagers maybe. But happy together in an unconvential fairy tale and then we will have our own unique stories to tell. How we fucking did it. We really did, and we did it the way we god damn pleased. So this is it. The page, the chapter i never dreamed of getting to. the part where the story is my own and it's not edited. The curse words aren't replaced by some well meaning adult. It's all me and i think i'm finally growing up.

And i'm very excited about singing Santeria (By sublime of course) for Discord at the Dice show because i'm special. ANd for right now i almost feel happy.

And also i am crazy. I'm going to get pyschoanalized on thursday. My fear of death is apparently a problem. I wonder how they will fix it. Make me live forever.

And i'd also like to kick this thought onto the computer: i miss Westchester, the boy no the town. And i miss all my friends who don't miss me. To the old crew: i'll see you in another life when we're cats, cuz cats stay high forever. Meaning we will be friends forever.

This is the end of the begining.